So in obvious contentment a year has passed. A glorious mother fucking year. Done with the MBA that I had so gloriously left home to earn. The good news is I had a lot to do. The bad, well there isn't any bad. Just good. I'm done with the college, the politics, the drama, the shit that the hole brought in.
Life sometimes can be cruel. Sometimes, it's a plain mother fucking bitch. Yeah that's what this post should be named. The Mother fucking Bitch! Say that again (In your head please) The Mother FUCKING Bitch! People with their random rants, their everyday snide remarks, the downtrodden society we're going to bring ourselves up into. Anyways, but life has to go on. And on it did, with this ... .
Pushing towards the edge of time,
Less travelled than a lot we are.
But lest we forget the memories that we have,
Important it is to us and to many.
Friends and a foe too many we made,
Hatred is and will lie deep among us.
Kill the hatred, for peace has come,
Call the summer, for winter is done.
For two long years we suffer,
O' good men, the knights of honour.
Look to the east where the good sun rises,
Take away those sins, take away those vices.
In ridicule, we lay our arms,
Only to lie in desperation to put ourselves into harm.
Two howling years have finally come to an end,
As lone wolves, we are left to fend.
A pack we are, a pack we shall be,
The future is ours and they will see.
Lo and behold young kin!
The time will be yours.
Life that is yours will soon begin.
Good luck, fare well young knight,
Make the best of war,
Hope you see no plight.
Watch this to understand what I'm going through right now!
Sunday, 21 April 2013
Sunday, 4 March 2012
Om Purity Namah
Special, wonderful, sumptuous, beautiful.
These were the four words that shout out loud in my mind. This was Monday
morning 3:18 Am. I was watching Real Steel, a Steven Spielberg original about
robots and these concoctive words came yelling out of my mind. You ask
yourself, why yelling? Because I am a twisted individual with a mind of the
joker. Scar faced who bellows loud only to say – Hello to his little friend. I
am a man with a machete. I am not going to introduce you to the topic. You
already know her.
You know her because she is Omni present. She
calms you down, she comforts you. She let you lie on her lap when you needed
her the most. Her warmth kept you away from the immoral cold. No wonder she is
special, no wonder she is God.
She has magic. Magic in her hands – those
very hands around you, sometimes rustling through your hair. Her hands caress you from the evil trenches
and lift your sins that were to eat your soul apart. Her hand feeds you. Her
hand feels you. No wonder she is wonderful. So wonderful you can cry.
You know her because she is extravagant.
Extravagant to make our lives a little luxurious. She is a star that never
forgets to shine even during the day. She is an opioid. I am addicted to her.
No wonder she is sumptuous. So sumptuous that she makes me look poor.
She is exquisite. Just like that of the
Kohinoor- one of a kind. She is melodious, gorgeous and lovely. So gorgeous
that the Taj was built for her, a man Romeo died for her, a son cries for her.
So mellifluous that a lullaby feels like honey. No wonder she is beautiful. So
beautiful that she makes us look ugly.
Even after twenty four years, eleven months
and 29 days of my being born into this society, I fail to understand her. We
all fail to understand the Eve of nature. We have ostracized her, killed her,
beat her, ridiculed her, and enslaved her.
For lest we forget that she is powerful,
she has might. She is the Agni, but yet douses the flame. She is the kaali maa
and still enjoys the attention of philanderers. She toils and she reproduces.
She is the Ganges, she is the mata. She is a girl, a sister, a mother or a
wife. She is A WOMAN.
Let
this 8th of March be special. Give your neighbour, your girl friend,
your teacher a hug and thank them for being a part of this society. Thank them
for being Omni present, thank her for her magic, thank her for being chic, and
thank her for being exquisite.
Thursday, 8 December 2011
The Smiling Slitherer
Grass that grows up to knee high, flat lands and the head. Perfecto mundo habitat for the reptile that speaks danger for itself - The black mamba.
The black mamba is a slithery, slimy and probably has a fine distinction of being the most ugliest amphibian in the animal kingdom. A narcissist of sorts, the chimpo (as fondly called by his cousins — the snakes) has fangs the size of a saber tooth's canine.
Its head reminds me of a gorilla. Ironically though, the brain size of the mamba shows unique equivalence to that of a squirrel. His vision has been rated 'X' by the animal censor board. Apparently the highest sexually degrading content in the animal world ever been rated by the board. Talking about sexual degradation, the most unique part of his upper torso is his 'hump.' The face hump that is.
Black Mamba uses this face hump as a weapon of mass degradation. The nom de guerre 'Pommie' that was given by his arch enemies is feared by many. Word has it that when Pommie meets his prey, he first spits at them, decapitates and then devours his dine.
We've had the opportunity of talking to one of the survivors of The Mamba. One Ms. Ashraf, a student of a college had to say, "हमरा पति और मैं बगीचा मैं घुमात रहे थे की यह कला नाग कमीना हमर को कटने लगा. अच्छा हुआ की हमरा पति जान हमारे साथ थे. हम बचत बचत बच गए. साला को हम काट के रखेंगे. "
Repeated requests were made to contact another Mamba survivor Ms. Mandanna, however, wished to stay aloof of the situation and asked for privacy.
A ferocious animal that he is, the Mamba likes to choos his pray right before decapitation . His venom contains a high dosage of neurotoxins that is bound to put the biggest animal in the jungle kingdom to a comatose.
The mamba must not be feared, forest officials say. However, he shouldn't be taken lightly. They say that surviving the mamba is a challenge and as humanoids of Century 21, precaution is the only way out.
News report by - BSchoolPandu
The black mamba is a slithery, slimy and probably has a fine distinction of being the most ugliest amphibian in the animal kingdom. A narcissist of sorts, the chimpo (as fondly called by his cousins — the snakes) has fangs the size of a saber tooth's canine.
Its head reminds me of a gorilla. Ironically though, the brain size of the mamba shows unique equivalence to that of a squirrel. His vision has been rated 'X' by the animal censor board. Apparently the highest sexually degrading content in the animal world ever been rated by the board. Talking about sexual degradation, the most unique part of his upper torso is his 'hump.' The face hump that is.
Black Mamba uses this face hump as a weapon of mass degradation. The nom de guerre 'Pommie' that was given by his arch enemies is feared by many. Word has it that when Pommie meets his prey, he first spits at them, decapitates and then devours his dine.
We've had the opportunity of talking to one of the survivors of The Mamba. One Ms. Ashraf, a student of a college had to say, "हमरा पति और मैं बगीचा मैं घुमात रहे थे की यह कला नाग कमीना हमर को कटने लगा. अच्छा हुआ की हमरा पति जान हमारे साथ थे. हम बचत बचत बच गए. साला को हम काट के रखेंगे. "
Repeated requests were made to contact another Mamba survivor Ms. Mandanna, however, wished to stay aloof of the situation and asked for privacy.
A ferocious animal that he is, the Mamba likes to choos his pray right before decapitation . His venom contains a high dosage of neurotoxins that is bound to put the biggest animal in the jungle kingdom to a comatose.
The mamba must not be feared, forest officials say. However, he shouldn't be taken lightly. They say that surviving the mamba is a challenge and as humanoids of Century 21, precaution is the only way out.
News report by - BSchoolPandu
Wednesday, 7 December 2011
The Battle of life
It's fifteen past two in the afternoon. There's fire all around. Mortars and shells zips right past my ears. The sky is bloody red — red with blood that is. Droopy shoulders, exhaustion and defeat ream across their heads. Our men came in a batch of 60 platoons. 30 in the infantry, 10 engineers and the rest were heavy machinery. A handful of the 60 survive.
With defeat and death simultaneously kissing our forehead, the only motivation to keep my men alive is to tell them to stick to their ground and they are. Our pre - battle strategies have failed and how bad! We underestimated the might of the enemy. She is ruthless, merciless, soul - less et al. She came all alone, killing many, devouring each piece by piece. She arrived with a platoon of one. Just one! A platoon of pink, a trojan horse of sorts.
As fear came to light, I was reminded of the fearful days at Hiroshima. The south paw clawed into our souls like a tigress that jumps on to her prey.
Today lord, I ask for forgiveness. Forgive me for the sins committed by us. We apologize. Forgive my men for the adulterous life we lead. Forgive our enemy for she is just another pawn of a larger cause - political.
My eyes are droopy. The heart beats harder, I feel it. I must go, I must go. I hear nothing but an aching screeching sound. I see the light, I see the light.
With defeat and death simultaneously kissing our forehead, the only motivation to keep my men alive is to tell them to stick to their ground and they are. Our pre - battle strategies have failed and how bad! We underestimated the might of the enemy. She is ruthless, merciless, soul - less et al. She came all alone, killing many, devouring each piece by piece. She arrived with a platoon of one. Just one! A platoon of pink, a trojan horse of sorts.
As fear came to light, I was reminded of the fearful days at Hiroshima. The south paw clawed into our souls like a tigress that jumps on to her prey.
Today lord, I ask for forgiveness. Forgive me for the sins committed by us. We apologize. Forgive my men for the adulterous life we lead. Forgive our enemy for she is just another pawn of a larger cause - political.
My eyes are droopy. The heart beats harder, I feel it. I must go, I must go. I hear nothing but an aching screeching sound. I see the light, I see the light.
Saturday, 5 November 2011
Whose line is it anyway?
To some, this month’s newsletter may remind of the televised comedy game show hosted by Drew Carey and his crew. But for us at Zeist, this isn’t a game and neither is it comical. We’re talking about serious lines. Serious business lines – Below and Above. Yes! This month’s newsletter is about what Below and Above the line strategies are and how you could use these strategies to your advantage. Enjoy Reading…..
So what is this ‘line’ that has generated a huge buzz?
Fine, fine to those of you who still haven’t understood the LINE, they’re none other than Below the line (synonymously known as BTL) and Above the line (in memoirs called as ATL) strategies.
These words (ATL and BTL that is) are one of the most commonly used jargons coming out from a marketing guru or any consultant. AND no, you won’t find it in the older version of your well preserved Marketing Management by Phillip Kotler book either. So here it goes - ATL and BTL are nothing but promotional activities undertaken by companies. The outlying difference is in their nature of the activity and the costs attached to conduct the same. ATL has a wider target base and audience reach vis – a – vis BTL and is much more expensive (obviously due to the activity undertaken) than that of BTL.
Examples please?
Okay. This is simple. Remember how I told you about the wide target base that ATL covers. Well think about it! What would be the easiest way to cover a million targets all over a city, state, country, region or even continent! TELEVISION! Oui, c’est la télé! Obviously everyone’s hooked to it. So why not ADVERTISE! If I had to divide ATL strategies and rank them according to order of importance, I’d totally put television commercials at the numero uno spot! I feel that if there’s something that’s worth it and it’s on the tele, the product or service will sell like hot cakes.
Print ads would be next on my top list. Believe it or not, print adverts are the most sought after by many companies. The reason – People love newspapers. Who wouldn’t like to have a sip of his early morning chai and cigarette and read the newspaper! Ah everyone’s favorite pass time. Volkswagen is one great company that really takes its print ad campaigns seriously. Remember the talking newspaper? Yes, now that’s some good food for thought. Isn’t it?
Billboards – Yep you see them everywhere. From the alley or what we call nukkad to the freeways and expressways. Just like newspapers, billboards according to me, will never cease to exist. Why? Obviously because of its popularity. Think about it – You’re stuck in a traffic jam whilst you’re on your way to the office. What do you see? A huge pair of ________. Now who wouldn’t those pair of __________ (Fill as per convenience – No puns intended!) Obviously that’s caught your attention hasn’t it? This is the magic of billboard advertising.
My next, would encompass a dying breed of media - The Radio. Sadly, when Freddie Bulsara Mercury sang Radio Gaga little did he know that the radio would have been a dying breed. However, it should be noted that a lot of people like me still listen to the radio and go gaga about it. As a manager if your target fits the radio loving bill, take the risk.
Now that we’re done with ATL, we should move on with some BTL examples. BTL is one of the most exciting and ‘fun’ strategies that you as a reader could come out with. BTL allows you to be funky, innovative, cool, haute, name the adjective and you could position them under this category. The only thing is – IT BETTER BE CHEAP! One good vantage point BTL has against that of ATL is that it is less risky. Well we at Zeist know how BTL works and love our below the line activities.
Some of our BTL activities in the past have included street guerilla marketing activities that have been very effective. All you’d need is a runner boy and some banners. Your total cost – Anything between $25 - $50 (For 8 hours a day). Moreover, it acts as a cheap source of advertising – I like to call it – The mini B! B obviously being the billboard. Now isn’t that a brilliant cost saver idea?
E – mailers and Newsletters – I could put this under an informative advertising category if there were any. E – mailers and newsletters give your target audience the required information and passes on the message you’re looking to provide. The only problem here is that you need a list of contacts – something you could either generate by your own list of networks or pay for a database contact. The disadvantage you may face by using this strategy is that you may want to check up on is how many people are actually interested in reading your newsletter a.k.a – who’s your target? Once that’s been sorted out, you will need to segregate your database and that itself is a tedious process. Good luck with that!
Flyers – If you can’t afford a print ad, I’d suggest go for newspaper flyers. Extremely cheap and has a wide target reach. Your flyers need to be extremely catchy and graphically appealing or else it goes straight into the junk box. Don’t worry about that, we’ll help you with it.
The World Wide Web – Yes the internet. Now there’s a huge disparity under which segment the internet would fall under. The way I look at it is that it depends on your budget just like the other strategies. Posting advertisements on facebook for a nominal amount or paying a bomb to get your website done in flash. Totally your call. However, the advantage here is brand visibility over the new media. Everyone’s looking for a piece of cake in this side of the world. The social media is another area where everyone – from companies to individuals are looking to make the most out of the least amount of investment.
So here you have it examples of both BTL and ATL activities. I’ll leave you with two things.
One – Don’t discriminate BTL and ATL. Both of them have their own advantages and fallacies. In the end, it is you as a manager have to decide. If I had the money, I’d be looking to minimize my risk by investing 60% on ATL and 40% on BTL.
Two – My top ten of BTL and ATL strategies that you could use to market your company.
Nikhil’s top ten favorite BTL and ATL strategies : -
So what is this ‘line’ that has generated a huge buzz?
Fine, fine to those of you who still haven’t understood the LINE, they’re none other than Below the line (synonymously known as BTL) and Above the line (in memoirs called as ATL) strategies.
These words (ATL and BTL that is) are one of the most commonly used jargons coming out from a marketing guru or any consultant. AND no, you won’t find it in the older version of your well preserved Marketing Management by Phillip Kotler book either. So here it goes - ATL and BTL are nothing but promotional activities undertaken by companies. The outlying difference is in their nature of the activity and the costs attached to conduct the same. ATL has a wider target base and audience reach vis – a – vis BTL and is much more expensive (obviously due to the activity undertaken) than that of BTL.
Examples please?
Okay. This is simple. Remember how I told you about the wide target base that ATL covers. Well think about it! What would be the easiest way to cover a million targets all over a city, state, country, region or even continent! TELEVISION! Oui, c’est la télé! Obviously everyone’s hooked to it. So why not ADVERTISE! If I had to divide ATL strategies and rank them according to order of importance, I’d totally put television commercials at the numero uno spot! I feel that if there’s something that’s worth it and it’s on the tele, the product or service will sell like hot cakes.
Print ads would be next on my top list. Believe it or not, print adverts are the most sought after by many companies. The reason – People love newspapers. Who wouldn’t like to have a sip of his early morning chai and cigarette and read the newspaper! Ah everyone’s favorite pass time. Volkswagen is one great company that really takes its print ad campaigns seriously. Remember the talking newspaper? Yes, now that’s some good food for thought. Isn’t it?
Billboards – Yep you see them everywhere. From the alley or what we call nukkad to the freeways and expressways. Just like newspapers, billboards according to me, will never cease to exist. Why? Obviously because of its popularity. Think about it – You’re stuck in a traffic jam whilst you’re on your way to the office. What do you see? A huge pair of ________. Now who wouldn’t those pair of __________ (Fill as per convenience – No puns intended!) Obviously that’s caught your attention hasn’t it? This is the magic of billboard advertising.
My next, would encompass a dying breed of media - The Radio. Sadly, when Freddie Bulsara Mercury sang Radio Gaga little did he know that the radio would have been a dying breed. However, it should be noted that a lot of people like me still listen to the radio and go gaga about it. As a manager if your target fits the radio loving bill, take the risk.
Now that we’re done with ATL, we should move on with some BTL examples. BTL is one of the most exciting and ‘fun’ strategies that you as a reader could come out with. BTL allows you to be funky, innovative, cool, haute, name the adjective and you could position them under this category. The only thing is – IT BETTER BE CHEAP! One good vantage point BTL has against that of ATL is that it is less risky. Well we at Zeist know how BTL works and love our below the line activities.
Some of our BTL activities in the past have included street guerilla marketing activities that have been very effective. All you’d need is a runner boy and some banners. Your total cost – Anything between $25 - $50 (For 8 hours a day). Moreover, it acts as a cheap source of advertising – I like to call it – The mini B! B obviously being the billboard. Now isn’t that a brilliant cost saver idea?
E – mailers and Newsletters – I could put this under an informative advertising category if there were any. E – mailers and newsletters give your target audience the required information and passes on the message you’re looking to provide. The only problem here is that you need a list of contacts – something you could either generate by your own list of networks or pay for a database contact. The disadvantage you may face by using this strategy is that you may want to check up on is how many people are actually interested in reading your newsletter a.k.a – who’s your target? Once that’s been sorted out, you will need to segregate your database and that itself is a tedious process. Good luck with that!
Flyers – If you can’t afford a print ad, I’d suggest go for newspaper flyers. Extremely cheap and has a wide target reach. Your flyers need to be extremely catchy and graphically appealing or else it goes straight into the junk box. Don’t worry about that, we’ll help you with it.
The World Wide Web – Yes the internet. Now there’s a huge disparity under which segment the internet would fall under. The way I look at it is that it depends on your budget just like the other strategies. Posting advertisements on facebook for a nominal amount or paying a bomb to get your website done in flash. Totally your call. However, the advantage here is brand visibility over the new media. Everyone’s looking for a piece of cake in this side of the world. The social media is another area where everyone – from companies to individuals are looking to make the most out of the least amount of investment.
So here you have it examples of both BTL and ATL activities. I’ll leave you with two things.
One – Don’t discriminate BTL and ATL. Both of them have their own advantages and fallacies. In the end, it is you as a manager have to decide. If I had the money, I’d be looking to minimize my risk by investing 60% on ATL and 40% on BTL.
Two – My top ten of BTL and ATL strategies that you could use to market your company.
Nikhil’s top ten favorite BTL and ATL strategies : -
- Social Media Games/Contests – Facebook, Twitter
- Viral Videos (Made In-house)
- Television Commercials
- Guerilla Marketing Campaigns
- Billboards/ Posters/ Banners
- Print – Advertisements
- Online Advertisements
- Competitions
- Coupons/ Groupons and finally…
- Workshops/ Tie – ups/ Exhibitions
P.S. – We’d like to hear from you. Please do let us know what you think of our newletters. You can mail us at nikhil@zeistmarketing.com or info@zeistmarketing.com We love feedback!
Wednesday, 14 September 2011
Complexities
Disaster (n) - According to the Dictionary of Nikhil Paul - An atomic bomb waiting to explode; Nuclear fusion; TNT; a unit of Hitler.
Usage - He has had a disastrous life. He is pissed.
Life is beautiful, life is good, life is wonderful ... total crap; utter bs. Yeah, today I admit, I accept, my life is a failure. An utter failure. I could try to keep it happy, but some thing or the other just kills it. I would like to mention that there are a few factors that take away my state of equilibrium.
1. External factors - People. Yes, this is one attribute that could lead to disaster. They can take you from a crest to a freaking depressive low. They can push things to the limit. It is sickening to see that I am in an industry where 'sucking of cock' is mandatory. Once upon a time, I loved selling stuff. I loved being creative, I loved talking to people, I loved meeting them, I loved having a beer on a saturday with people I hung out with. I loved being myself. Time changes the best. It pushes people to the brink of insanity. It makes you mad! And to be honest, I'm on the brink of the brink of insanity. One step and I will loose it. I can't believe this is what happened to me! A happy child, a happy go lucky teen, a happy pilot, a happy marketer but a ridiculously angry post graduate student. Where did that happiness go? I can attribute the success of me being angry to people. Friends, ex girlfriends, teachers, sadistic homosexual whores, yes all of you. You were right; I was wrong. There was nothing wrong with you. I will admit today, with this blog, right now that all my bloody life, I was wrong. I have been a skillful master of deception, a disciple of satan, a religo - phobe, a friend of Lucifer.
2. Internal Dysfunction - To some, mentally delinquent to the more considerate, a bloody retard, a psycho, señor slow. This, you can't blame people. I will be considerate to blame and re iterate that frustration, don't bother to ask me what has lead me to internal dysfunction. It's a shitty feeling one doesn't want to go through. One minute you're at a high, the second, you just want to kill yourself. Bleh, I wish I could do the second, but I think I rate myself a little higher on the scale. Suicidal tendencies do arrive once in a while, but then the better (I thank myself for keeping an ounce of sanity) takes over as soon as the condition arrives. Internal dysfunction should however be kept hidden. Hidden from the sight of the public. Many people find that extremely hard to do. I was successful for a while. However, the problem with me was that I couldn't hold it any more. The bucket couldn't take it anymore. I had to spill the beans. I can't stop anymore.
Splitting your head open is the only solution. I wish that I could just split my skull open for once and just try understanding my brain. See if there is any tumor that I could take out and get it over with once and for all! If given the opportunity, I would like to give my brain as a specimen for study.
I would suggest that the people who refrain to understand me or wouldn't wish to, take exhibit a and just see how complex and difficult it is. Even after that, if you wish not to, I wish you the best of luck because all you're going to get from me is a bunch of low caste, uncouth love that would define my sense of inhumanity.
There are thoughts that I have schizophrenically added in to your complex. Just like how broken this blog is, I am going to break it down even further. I am not going to conclude. I am not going to change. I am not going to stop being mad. I am not going to stop being complex. All I want to stop is the madness.
Tuesday, 23 August 2011
Letters from a lover
Your sweetness is what captivates me, your smile is what entices me.
You being around me brings a smile on to my face, you being with me makes me happy.
Your thought is tender, your love wild.
With you my love I will stay for ever,
and for ever I will be yours.
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