The Smiling Slitherer

Grass that grows up to knee high, flat lands and the head. Perfecto mundo habitat for the reptile that speaks danger for itself - The black mamba.

The black mamba is a slithery, slimy and probably has a fine distinction of being the most ugliest amphibian in the animal kingdom. A narcissist of sorts, the chimpo (as fondly called by his cousins — the snakes) has fangs the size of a saber tooth's canine.

Its head reminds me of a gorilla. Ironically though, the brain size of the mamba shows unique equivalence to that of a squirrel. His vision has been rated 'X' by the animal censor board. Apparently the highest sexually degrading content in the animal world ever been rated by the board. Talking about sexual degradation, the most unique part of his upper torso is his 'hump.' The face hump that is.

Black Mamba uses this face hump as a weapon of mass degradation. The nom de guerre 'Pommie' that was given by his arch enemies is feared by many. Word has it that when Pommie meets his prey, he first spits at them, decapitates and then devours his dine.

We've had the opportunity of talking to one of the survivors of The Mamba. One Ms. Ashraf, a student of a college had to say, "हमरा पति और मैं बगीचा मैं घुमात रहे थे की यह कला नाग कमीना हमर को कटने लगा. अच्छा हुआ की हमरा पति जान हमारे साथ थे. हम बचत बचत बच गए. साला को हम काट के रखेंगे. "

Repeated requests were made to contact another Mamba survivor Ms. Mandanna, however, wished to stay aloof of the situation and asked for privacy.

A ferocious animal that he is, the Mamba likes to choos his pray right before decapitation . His venom contains a high dosage of neurotoxins that is bound to put the biggest animal in the jungle kingdom to a comatose.

The mamba must not be feared, forest officials say. However, he shouldn't be taken lightly. They say that surviving the mamba is a challenge and as humanoids of Century 21, precaution is the only way out.

News report by - BSchoolPandu

The Battle of life

It's fifteen past two in the afternoon. There's fire all around. Mortars and shells zips right past my ears. The sky is bloody red — red with blood that is. Droopy shoulders, exhaustion and defeat ream across their heads. Our men came in a batch of 60 platoons. 30 in the infantry, 10 engineers and the rest were heavy machinery. A handful of the 60 survive.

With defeat and death simultaneously kissing our forehead, the only motivation to keep my men alive is to tell them to stick to their ground and they are. Our pre - battle strategies have failed and how bad! We underestimated the might of the enemy. She is ruthless, merciless, soul - less et al. She came all alone, killing many, devouring each piece by piece. She arrived with a platoon of one. Just one! A platoon of pink, a trojan horse of sorts.

As fear came to light, I was reminded of the fearful days at Hiroshima. The south paw clawed into our souls like a tigress that jumps on to her prey.

Today lord, I ask for forgiveness. Forgive me for the sins committed by us. We apologize. Forgive my men for the adulterous life we lead. Forgive our enemy for she is just another pawn of a larger cause - political.

My eyes are droopy. The heart beats harder, I feel it. I must go, I must go. I hear nothing but an aching screeching sound. I see the light, I see the light.